Bucket List

#27: To perform at Tuachan.
And next season is mine for the taking!

Moving.

In exactly 16 days, I will be moving out.. into an apartment.
Away from my family.
With two girls I've never met before in my life.



I'm excited!
To have my own place.
To live closer to school.
To make lots of new friends.
To host BBQs and game nights.
To be able to wake up a half an hour before class and still be on time.
To play sand volleyball whenever I feel like it.
To buy groceries.
To decorate & furnish.



I'm sad.
To leave my parents.
To leave Kyler.
To not be here when my sister is tiny.
To leave Koda.
To abandon the days of towel fights, water fights, and all-around torture from Dad.
To leave Mom, one of my best friends in the whole world.
To leave my ward.
To leave my friends.
To pack up all of my stuff.
To leave the porch swing(s).



Life is gonna change forever.
That's for sure.

hehe :}

"Beliefs get ingrained in ourselves. It just takes the effort to recognize that they're wrong by facing them with honesty.

Doing that over time changes our thoughts."

-Jeff Kohler

People tell us things. They tell us we're not good enough, that we aren't living up to our potential, that we'll never accomplish our goals, that we won't live up to our dreams. After hearing these types of things for so long, we begin to believe them. They are "ingrained" into our very being. And they're hard to get rid of. But if we learn to decipher these lies and deceit from the truth.. We will come to know that we are each sons and daughters of our Heavenly Father. He loves each and every one of us so very much, and has blessed us with unique talents and gifts. It is our sacred duty to recognize the blessings we have been given.. to magnify and perfect our talents so that we may glorify the Lord through them.

Some may tell us that we aren't special, that we are nobody, that we aren't worth anything.

This is not true.

We are all special in the eyes of our Heavenly Father. We are precious. We are loved. We are priceless. If we can realize this, we can change our way of thinking about ourselves. We may come to know of our Father's love for us. And we may come to recognize those around us who truly care about us, and who would do anything to see us succeed.

"Nobody can make you feel inferior without your consent."

-Eleanor Roosevelt

Today's Talk

As you probably already know, yesterday was Pioneer Day. I think it necessary to say “probably” because yesterday on Facebook, one of my out-of-state friends put “Happy Pioneer Day Utahns!” as her status, and someone had commented that they had no idea there was such a holiday.. They had to look it up.

Before delving into the specific topics I’d like to cover today, I want to propose the question: “What, or who, is a pioneer?” President Monson defined a pioneer as “someone who goes before for others to follow”. Yes, the saints who crossed the plains in order to reach Salt Lake were pioneers, but so are many of us here today. In his talk at the Fresno California North Stake Conference in 1997, Elder Larry Lawrence spoke about a few different types of pioneers. Some of the examples he gave include:

• Being the first person in your family to join the Church.
• Being the first person in your immediate family to serve a mission.
• Being married in the temple without members of your immediate family present.
• Being the first person in your family to go to college.
• Being the oldest child in your family.

If you fall into any of these categories, you are a pioneer. You are leading the way; providing an example for others to follow. If you are the first person in your family to join the Church, you have most likely left so much behind. Family, friends, a lifestyle. A verse in the book of Matthew gives reassurance to pioneers of this kind: “And everyone that hath forsaken houses, or brethren, or sisters, or father, or mother, or wife, or children, or lands, for my name’s sake, shall receive an hundredfold, and shall inherit everlasting life”. Being the first to do anything is scary. But it can be a wonderful thing. By being the first to join the church, serve a mission, be married in the temple, go to college, or anything else, you are setting an example to those around you. And by blazing a path for those around you to follow, you will receive countless blessings.

The faith of the pioneers crossing the plains to the Salt Lake Valley was indescribably strong and pure. The trials they went through only strengthened that faith in this gospel. In the 2002 July Ensign, the first presidency message by James E. Faust stated this:

“These excruciating experiences developed in these pioneers an unshakable faith in God. Said Elizabeth Horrocks Jackson Kingsford, “I believe the Recording Angel has inscribed in the archives above, and that my sufferings for the Gospel’s sake will be sanctified unto me for my good.” 5

In addition to the legacy of faith bequeathed by those who crossed the plains, they also left a great heritage of love—love of God and love of mankind. It is an inheritance of sobriety, independence, hard work, high moral values, and fellowship. It is a birthright of obedience to the commandments of God and loyalty to those whom God has called to lead this people. It is a legacy of forsaking evil. Immorality, alternative lifestyles, gambling, selfishness, dishonesty, unkindness, and addiction to alcohol and drugs are not part of the gospel of Jesus Christ.

I have wondered why these intrepid pioneers had to pay for their faith with such a terrible price in agony and suffering. Why were not the elements tempered to spare them from their profound agony? I believe their lives were consecrated to a higher purpose through their suffering. Their love for the Savior was burned deep in their souls and into the souls of their children and their children’s children. The motivation for their lives came from a true conversion in the center of their souls. As President Gordon B. Hinckley has said, “When there throbs in the heart of an individual Latter-day Saint a great and vital testimony of the truth of this work, he will be found doing his duty in the Church.” 6

Above and beyond the epic historical events they participated in, the pioneers found a guide to personal living. They found reality and meaning in their lives. In the difficult days of their journey, the members of the Martin and Willie Handcart Companies encountered some apostates from the Church who were returning from the West, going back to the East. These apostates tried to persuade some in the companies to turn back. A few did turn back. But the great majority of the pioneers went forward to a heroic achievement in this life and to eternal life in the life hereafter. Francis Webster, a member of the Martin Company, stated, “Everyone of us came through with the absolute knowledge that God lives for we became acquainted with him in our extremities.” I hope that this priceless legacy of faith left by the pioneers will inspire all of us to more fully participate in the Lord’s work of bringing to pass the immortality and eternal life of His children.”

In 2005, I had the opportunity to travel with my stake to Wyoming and take part in a four day trek - walking in the very footsteps of my pioneer ancestors through Dan W. Jones’ Cove, Martin’s Cove, the Sweetwater River, Sixth Crossing, Rocky Ridge, and Rock Creek Hollow. All while pulling a handcart laden with my “family’s” belongings. At each historic stop, we were told stories of how the pioneers suffered and died and had to leave family members and friends bodies on the side of the trail for the wolves to come and take away. With each story my heart felt more love for them, for the sacrifices they went through, for the ultimate test of faith that they had to endure. But it didn’t really hit home for me until Rocky Ridge. The bishops of each ward were told to give out “handicaps” and “trials” to certain people. And I was one of them. My bishop stopped me and took me aside, while my family kept going. He told me that because of the horrible conditions and suffering I had gone through, I had lost my sight. He then tied a blindfold around my eyes, and let me back to my handcart. I was terrified. I grabbed onto the back of that handcart and held on for dear life. We were crossing Rocky Ridge at that point, and there were rocks jutting out at every angle, waiting to trip me. The handcart was bouncing all over the place because of these rocks, and it was hard to hold on. But, by some miracle, I didn’t fall. I didn’t trip. I didn’t even stumble. And if you know me at all, it’s a rare day when I don’t stumble and trip and end up on the ground.. when I can see. But there was something there that day, surrounding me. Guiding me. I can only imagine that this is what the pioneers felt like when they were too cold and too exhausted to go on. I know that they had divine help, just like I did that day. On the trek we were told a story about a wife whose husband could not walk another step. So she put him in their handcart and pulled. Alone. We had eight of us to a handcart on our trek, and we still had troubles pulling it along. She had to have had angels helping her pull her husband across the plains in the bitter cold. Elder M. Russell Ballard said: “ Life isn’t always easy. At some point in our journey we may feel much as the pioneers did as they crossed [the plains] -- up to our knees in mud, forced to bury some of our dreams along the way. We all face rocky ridges, with the wind in our face and winter coming on too soon. Sometimes it seems as though there is no end to the dust that clouds our vision. Sharp edges of despair and discouragement jut out of the terrain to slow our passage. Occasionally we reach the top of one summit in life, as the pioneers did, only to see more mountain peaks ahead, higher and more challenging than the one we have just traversed. Tapping unseen reservoirs of faith and endurance, we, as did our forebears, inch over forward toward that day when our voices can join with those of all pioneers who have endured in faith, singing, ‘All is well! All is well!’” It is my hope that one day we will all have the unwavering faith and strength that these pioneers had, so that we may be able to overcome any trial that comes my way, and so we may sing with our brothers and sisters and rejoice of our successful trip home to our Father in Heaven.
The love that these Latter-Day-Saints had for their brothers and sisters in the Church is immeasurable. Many great acts of service were performed and recorded in the journals of these saints. But the one that hits home to me is an event that transpired at the Sweetwater River crossing. Although not the only remarkable story associated with the rescue, the Martin Company’s crossing of the Sweetwater serves as a reminder that for an extended period of time countless individuals demonstrated the best of human nature under extremely adverse conditions.
“After the [Martin Company] had given up in despair, after all hopes had vanished, after every apparent avenue of escape seemed closed, three eighteen-year-old boys belonging to the relief party came to the rescue, and to the astonishment of all who saw, carried nearly every member of the ill-fated handcart company across the snowbound stream. The strain was so terrible, and the exposure so great, that in later years all the boys died from the effects of it. When President Brigham Young heard of this heroic act, he wept like a child, and later declared publicly, ‘that act alone will ensure C. Allen Huntington, George W. Grant and David P. Kimball an everlasting salvation in the Celestial Kingdom of God, worlds without end.’”
I’m sure you’ve all heard the song, “Go Bring Them In,” but I’m going to read the lyrics for you today.

November 1856
Just west of Devil’s Gate
A place they now call Martin’s Cove
Sacred ground of faith
Some hours ago we somehow crossed
Sweetwater’s sheets of ice
At times it took your breath away
At times it took your life

The sky is growing dark again
There’s little food to eat
The chilling wind cut to the bone
I cannot feel my feet
I know that Zion lay just ahead
As I rest and close my eyes
Will I wake to see the morn
Or maybe Paradise?

Now tonight I dream of Kirtland
Zion’s Camp’s holy test
I dream of Independence
Liberty and Far West
Tonight I dream of Nauvoo
Brother Joseph’s iron will
Tonight I dream of Carthage
And how we miss him still

And tonight I dream of Bethlehem
Nazareth and Galilee
Tonight I dream of miracles
From our Master and our King
Somewhere it starts as whispers
Then turns to shouts so clear
Wake up, wake up, it’s not a dream
The Valley Boys are here!

Go bring them in from the plains
Go bring them in from the storm
Like a fire the Spirit’s burning
Bring them in and keep them warm
Go bring them in from the plains
Go bring them in from the cold
Wrap your loving arms around them
Bring His peace to their souls

Now it’s me who walks these steps
Just west of Devil’s Gate
A place we now call Martin’s Cove
Sacred ground of faith
In silence and in reverence
Sweetwater we now cross
And hear the echo of their prayers
Their tears and their loss

The night still needs a light that shines
His truth we need to share
To honor those who came this way
We’ll lift up and we’ll care
On our backs and in our hearts
We’ll carry and proclaim
And heed a prophet’s call once more
Go bring them in from the plains!

George W. Grant, one of the three boys that carried the members of the Martin Handcart Company across the Sweetwater is my ancestor. And I’m so grateful for the knowledge that he was willing to risk his health and his life in order to preserve the lives of his brothers and sisters in the gospel. I can’t wait to meet him, and hear the story first hand. His story inspires me to serve my brothers and sisters. Because if I do, I know there will be blessings to follow. I encourage all of you to perform service. Although we may not have to ford a river full of ice in the dead of winter, carrying our friends across to safety, we can perform acts of service every day. Because, as the scripture states, “Inasmuch as ye have done it unto the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me.”

I love my mothers. I appreciate them for everything they do for me, and for my brothers and sisters. I know that they are doing His work. I could never express how truly grateful I am to them.

I am so proud to be a woman.. To be able to someday have the opportunity to raise my children in the gospel. In my patriarchal blessing it says that the greatest blessing I will ever be given is that of motherhood. And I truly believe that. I anxiously await the day that I get to hold a baby of my own in my arms. But until then, I will prepare myself the best I can.. become the best person that I can be.. so that I may be able to teach my children right from wrong, and share my testimony of the gospel with them.. so that they may know from the very beginning that it is true.